Over the weekend I took a break from my writing. I made a choice to pause for a minute.
Have you ever been at a place where you were doing something over and over and over again, to the point where you almost forgot WHY you were doing it to begin with?
That’s where I was.
Sometimes we can be doing something great, something that IS impacting God’s kingdom, but if our motives aren’t right, or if we forget our purpose in doing so, we are losing. We are failing.
When I started writing about 7 months ago, I wasn’t really sure why. I hadn’t written much before. It had never really been a dream or s passion of mine. BUT, I felt God tugging at my heart whispering “just write”. And so, I did.
And as I progressed into this world of blogging, and met other writers, I realized there is a lot more to this world than just writing. And I began to dream a little bit more. And piece by piece God has slowly led me along giving me tastes of possibilities.
So, I have tried to put the work behind it. I have received some training from people who actually know have experience in this field. I have educated myself. I have networked and tried to find mentors who can help me as I continue on this journey. And, I have set goals for my blog, and my ministry, and my future. Goals for growth, for followers, for contacts.
I don’t think there is anything wrong with that. I think it is wise. Wise to plan for the future.
Yet, at the same time, I am reminded. I am reminded that in anything and everything I do, it cannot be about me. It cannot be about how many followers I gain, or how many people respond with words of adoration. It is not about how awesome my website looks or how many shares I receive on facebook.
It is not about making my name famous.
It cannot be about me.
And if at some point in time, it becomes about my eloquent words, or my personal success, or MY name being known, then I should quit. I have failed. My work becomes pointless.
God is the one who has given me purpose. He is the one whom I serve.
I still dream. I still work. I still have hopes.
But, at the end of the day, it is His will that I pray to be done, not my own. If that means my blog never grows past 300 followers, so be it. If that means, I die, and no one remembers my name, so be it.
Ultimately, I am His, and my purpose is His.
And as I pause, and I think, and I pray, God is so faithful as to remind me once again that it’s not about me.
My friend, if you have lost your purpose as you walk through this life, can I encourage you to seek His will today? His purpose for you is the one that matters.
Father, your will above my own.
Psalm 37:5 “Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this.”