I recently heard of the death of a young lady in one of our surrounding communities. Rumor has it, a death caused by her own hands, suicide. As I heard those words my heart was broken. She is just one of the many whose lives have been taken in this manner in recent years.
When I heard her name I recognized it. When I saw her picture, my heart sank into my stomach.
You see, I recognized this young lady because I had met her before. In fact, about 2 years earlier, I had had the opportunity on a couple of different occasions to sit in her apartment with her and talk about life and mommy hood. At that time I had recently started a business which is what had landed me at her place. I had networked my way to her. And, the fact is, I had an agenda.
Please, don’t get me wrong, I understand that many businesses network and rely on others to get them certain places in their career. I understand that this is part of business and I am not saying that there is anything wrong with this.
But, as I looked back, I couldn’t help but wonder “what if?” As I thought about those times, my heart was sad. I was at her home for one reason, and one reason only- to further my business, my financial gain, to make my next move. As much as I try to reason it out in my head and make those times about her- helping her, getting to know her- the truth is at the end of the day it was really about ME. I was trying to move forward and she was just one of the many people who I met along the way. And, once I got what I wanted, I moved on.
Maybe I am trying to soothe my guilty conscious, but somehow it seems to me that we live in a world of people walking around with their own personal agendas. We all need someone to support our business, boost our status, or babysit our kids. AND so, many times we meet others, we talk to them- all for our own personal agenda. A lot of the time it is ALL about us.
We are a society of people walking around looking for the next person who we can gain from. After all, “looking out for #1” is what we have been taught all along the way.
Sadly, many times, we are NOT seeking deeper relationships. NOT seeking to love on others for the sheer reason of love. Many times NOT seeking to be a help and a blessing to others, but to ourselves.
I don’t know if anything I could have done or said might have made a difference in this young ladies life. Probably not… But, what if? What if I had walked into her apartment with NO other agenda besides showing her Christ’s love? What if I had chosen to bless her freely, with no strings attached, simply to be a blessing? WHAT IF I had the hope of Christ that she so desperately needed, but sharing that was not on my agenda for the day? What if?
Let’s stop seeing others for what they can do for US. Let’s make living out Christ’s love and sharing His hope our #1 priority. That way we never have to look back and wander “what if?”
What do you think?
1 John 4:7 “Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God.”
Matthew 6:19-21 “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”